I see the paintings. This isn’t his first rodeo.

Boss, I can’t make it to work today. There’s a cat on my car.

Woohoo! Bucket list complete!

Could also be the fumes from the batteries burning and all that.

It’s a common misconception that it was even called Ev to begin with. In reality, it used to be named Mt. Eh due to how underwhelming it is.

“Constant average query time” is not that hard to understand. It means that sometimes access time is e.g. linear, and sometimes you get your content before executing the code. With a hash table large enough and full enough, this can be used to fetch content seconds, minutes, days, potentially years before the program even exists. That’s one hell of a breakthrough.

[edit] /s, oops

This reads like a Terry Pratchett quote