Thank you for your service

Mos Eisley bartender.

“I need a cigarette.”

“A local Springfield man has reportedly won $10 million in the state lottery. Nevertheless, death comes for us all.”

I think the billionaires would actually go for this. And I’ll bet they all cry “class warfare” when we beat on their yachts with our tiny fists as the rest of us all drown.

Maul Blart, Bust Cop

In the grand scheme of things, 7 and 8 are very close to each other.

Mm… do tell 😏

Oh for sure if I was offered a trade, I’d abandon my disaster area of a place before you could blink.

“Do I… help? Should I play with his balls or something?”

*looks around my royally messed up apartment*

Um… seems okay to me…

Leak? Surely they mean “unintended emission.”

Good old fashion vanilla honesty is a good start!

“People who are brutally honest get more satisfaction out of the brutality than out of the honesty.” – Richard J. Needham

Expired tags.

Comm regulations are written in blood

Mm, I’ve tried leaving mastodon.social, and quickly found that a lot of the people I follow and my followers form an elaborate web of blocks/de-federations that meant I would inevitably lose contact with many people. They’re all good people, but I don’t think they’d change their own instances just for my sake. I could join like, three different instances just to keep in touch, but if forced to choose at this point, I might just give up on Mastodon altogether.

If you eat like Fred Flintstone you’ll have plenty of gas.

Send them sunflower seeds to put in their pockets 🌻