Vyvanse was perfection for me.

The drugs just made me even more aware I’m surrounded by crazy children. Maybe I did the wrong drugs.

Is there a possibility they’re cake? I could go for some cake.

I’m really into periods.

I admit it wasn’t at all what I expected. I thought it was going to be some account of an Arctic explorer dying or similar. It makes my point, though. If the little girl had perhaps thought to go find some dry kindling or a whale carcass, it might have been a very different story. That’s all I’m trying to say.

1.) I can’t even read the title, 2.) I still want the matches. I’m not saying I’ll use the matches themselves, but who knows, maybe I find wood or whale blubber to burn or something. Just give me the matches, please.

Fuck Apple and I’d prefer matches in Antarctica to no matches in Antarctica.

You have to press =

Didn’t mean to presume your need (or “lack thereof”) for pumpkin pussy, friend. Don’t shoot the messenger.

Meth abuse is a bitch.

Diddles Diminutive Daughters

Not working for me, says AI overview not available.

Of course not. We’re all you, dumbass!

I had the mental image of college kids doing keg stands, beer bongs, etc…not out of excess, but out of sheer desperation. They’re completely parched by that point, after decades of no liquids.

You were right. She got really sassy about another of my ex’s family, then stopped responding. Playing hard to get, the saucy minx.

This really undersells the sacrifice and the pieces of myself I pour into my shitposting. Just because I make it look easy doesn’t mean it always is.

I was thinking Monty Python.

September 23, 2008. FUCK.

Kinpussy for us southern folk.